Talking Tragedy with a Toddler

I am not the only one blogging about this topic this week, but I still wanted to share. If you are on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, or are a blog reader you have likely seen this quote from Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers)...

"When I was a boy and would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.'"

Yesterday I heard on the radio that a couple of explosives had been detonated at the Boston marathon. When I got back home I turned on the news so my mom and I could see what was going on. Kyler was watching and we had to explain to him in a non-scary way what we were watching. We told him some people got bad ouchies. He immediately saw the fire trucks, ambulances, and rescue workers. We then focused on those very nice people who were taking the people to the hospitals. So, I guess maybe it's a mother's instinct to focus on the helpers. Somewhere along the lines while growing up, we tend to lose focus on that and look more at the bad guys and tragedy. But seeing those helpers is something that can help comfort everyone, young and old.

The other thing I seem to do in the aftermath of these tragedies is use it as a Christian teaching moment with Kyler. He is to the age where he understands good and bad and he knows that Jesus wants us to do good. He actually brings it up quite often. When he does something nice, he will sometimes say that he is like Jesus. It makes my heart smile. :) He talks about how the firemen and police are so nice like Jesus. I pray that he grows up to be as selfless as these helpers we watch.

He also knows that when people die, we pray for them that they will go to heaven to be with Jesus. It's not easy talking about death with a two-year-old but I really feel like he needs to understand it at least to some extent. We focus on heaven and life after death (and lucky for me he hasn't asked a whole lot of questions beyond that) rather than the sad/scary parts. He also understands what death means in terms of no longer living because of seeing and learning about dead animals (which he is okay with as he knows about the circle of life and has been exposed to hunting all his life). Anyway, as sad as it is, we have had to pray for those babies at Sandy Hook and we will pray for the Boston marathon victims as well. We pray for their families that Jesus will help them not be so sad and for the victims themselves that Jesus will take them to heaven.

It's not easy talking tragedy with a toddler, but I feel like kids need to be exposed to the real world. We don't give Kyler all the details or anything too scary (especially now because our boy tends to have nightmares already). But kids need to understand that there is good and bad, and that bad things can happen to good people. They need to find a way to cope with bad things happening. And one way our Christian family copes with this is with faith and prayer. When he is older, we will also explain to him the sad/scary parts, and talk about how the victims and their families feel. He will need to continue to have empathy for others in order to be the person we want him to become. A helper.

Easter 2013

The week before Easter, the kids and I spent the week at Grandma and Grandpa's farmhouse outside of Wichita. I think Brett missed us but it only seemed fair to give these grandparents some extra time with the kids. Kyler had a blast. He followed Grandpa everywhere and if Grandpa left the room without him noticing, he would get up shortly after yelling "Dampa Charlie!" He also had to correct me anytime I told him to get back in his chair or that something was on our bed. It was Grandma Tammy's chair and Grandma Tammy's bed.

Dada and Kyler with the flamingos at the Sedgwick County Zoo. Oops... Mama cut Dada's head off in this pic!

The grizzly bear was the funniest animal. He was enjoying the warmer weather by lying on his back in a pool of water. 

While we were there we mostly hung out at their house. One morning we did venture out to visit some friends. Kyler had a lot of fun with Landon who is just a few months younger. The weather warmed up so we were able to spend a lot of time outside. We even visited the zoo on Friday since Brett was back with the day off. Kyler got to ride on Grandpa's fire truck and four wheeler and for Easter the kids had an egg hunt. When we got back home, the Easter bunny had been at our house. We were very thankful for the nice weather and time spent with family. We definitely have spring fever now!

Kyler had fun feeding the giraffes. I was surprised at how good this photo turned out.

Dying Easter Eggs

Kyler colored Easter eggs for the first time this year. He had a lot of fun doing it but he wasn't a big fan of eating the yolk when we tried one.

Kylerisms: The Dinosaur

Today while Brett was home for lunch, Kyler was in Myelle's room playing while I was feeding her. He held up his hands like he was holding an imaginary something and told me he caught a dinosaur. I asked him what he caught it with and if he caught it with his hands. He told me no, he caught it with a fishing pole. Then Brett came to tell him goodbye and Ky held up the dinosaur to his dad. Brett pretended to be scared...
Kyler: It's not scary.
Brett: Oh, it's a nice dinosaur?
Kyler: No, he's dead.

My Little Foodie

I may have created a monster. Or at least a really picky future husband with high standards when it comes to food. It's no secret that I like to cook and bake, and judging by how quickly food disappears around here I must not be half bad. Kyler has grown accustomed to this. He helps me browse Pinterest to figure out what we should have for dinner, slides a chair up to the counter to help me prepare whatever we are making each day, and eats pretty good most days.

Lately he has started making requests for what he wants to eat. It used to be easy things like macaroni and cheese (although I think he's always had homemade so that's not even as easy as it sounds) or cereal or pancakes.

But more recently he has been asking for bierocks quite often. When I ask what his favorite food is, that's his reply. I had told him over the weekend that we were out so he told me I should make some more. I explained that I couldn't because I didn't have any cabbage. Then yesterday he asked me, "you don't have any cabbage?" I replied by telling him that I now had cabbage since we had gone grocery shopping. So of course he says, "make some bierocks, mommy!" And now we are stocked up on bierocks for a week or so.

I had also made cinnamon rolls earlier in the week and we finished them off at breakfast yesterday. When I told him there were no more he told me to go to the store and get some more. Then I had to explain that they don't come from the store and reminded him that we made them at home.

Kylerisms: Cranberry

Kyler thinks it's funny to blow a raspberry on someone's cheek instead of giving a kiss sometimes. So today when he bumped his arm I gave him one instead of kissing his ouchie. Then he said to me, "I want to give you a cranberry." I knew exactly what he was talking about and had to giggle.

Our Little "Reader"

Kyler has been pretending to read his books a lot lately. He has always done this but now he thinks he is reading the words and will point to them as he narrates the book. He apparently pays good attention when we read to him because he gets a surprising number of words correct. Right now his favorite is the lone library book we have, "A Fly Went By." I took some video of him reading it. He even read it to his sister.

Potty Training - Take 6(ish)

Kyler is finally potty trained!!! We knew he could do it, he just apparently wasn't quite ready yet. We had tried a little a couple of months back before Myelle was born (mostly Grandma did the work) but he was uncooperative so we gave up after a day or so. We also tried again at Christmas when Brett was off work for several days to help but Kyler was again not interested in cooperating. So I guess technically this might be our sixth attempt.

The turning point occurred last week. I had been putting him in cloth diapers for a couple of reasons. First, Myelle was wearing them so it wasn't much more trouble to just have two in them at once. Second, they allow Kyler to feel the wetness so he doesn't like them as much. There were a couple of mornings where he would wake up and start playing without me even waking up. During that time he would dirty his diaper and not let me know. He had a couple of pretty bad diaper rashes as a result. I kept explaining that this is why he needs to start going on the potty chair so he won't get ouchies on his butt. Last Thursday morning he did this again so after I washed him up I left him bare bottomed to help the rash heal up. And during that time I got him to go potty on the potty chair.

I left him mostly bare bottomed Thursday and Friday and he occasionally would have underwear on. He was doing pretty good about going on the potty chair. I constantly asked him if he had to go and reminded him not to go in his underwear (or on my floor if he was bare bottomed). We spent lots of time on the potty chair reading books and trying to get the potty to come out. And when he did we would go crazy praising him and he would get a tootsie roll (we have a huge gallon bag full from the parade this summer that we've been using as potty bribes). We were putting him in cloth diapers at night and he would usually dirty them in the mornings before we got him changed.

Over the weekend he started doing even better. He was in underwear pretty much all the time even when sleeping. By Sunday, he only had one accident after his nap when we didn't make him go to the potty chair right away. He was also having trouble pooping on the potty chair and would start to go in his underwear when we would catch him and run him to the potty chair. Starting Sunday night, he did awesome even at night. He would wake up asking for water so I would go in and ask him if he needed to go on the potty chair. He did and I would get him a drink while he was sitting there. So for the past two nights he hasn't had an accident even at night. He is actually waking up to go on the potty chair which I think is pretty amazing. 

He has kept his underwear dry since Sunday after his nap at this point (and it is Tuesday morning). He did start to poop in his underwear earlier this morning but then later went on the potty chair so hopefully we have broken that barrier and we are on our way to being fully potty trained. It is great not having to change two kids' diapers. The next thing is to get him to go on a regular toilet which I think is probably going to be a big battle since Kyler is very stubborn about change (and he sits on his potty so it will be a big change for him). And we also need to work on teaching him to pull his pants down and up on his own so he is completely independent. For now, I'm happy with where he's at and we are so proud of him for finally taking this step. He even said yesterday, "I don't want to wear baby diapers anymore." Yay!

Update 1/25/13: Kyler's last accident was on Tuesday after his nap. He was too busy looking for something and must have forgotten to run to the potty chair. It is now Friday morning. He has the potty mastered and even asked to use the big toilet a couple of times (and was successful). He also seems to have gotten the hang of going #2 as he went twice yesterday, both on the potty without me forcing him to sit and try to go. Instead he asked to go and was able to. Last night he actually got up out of bed on his own, went to the bathroom, pulled his pants down and went potty. I only woke up because he was asking for a drink while sitting on the pot. He still needs help pulling his pants back up most time, and getting them down when he has his jeans on. We are really in disbelief about how well he's doing. I think we'll pack up the diapers today and I don't even see a reason to keep the plastic pants out since he's done so well at night.

Kid Things We'll Miss

Brett came up from the basement the other day laughing at how Kyler had left his toys. This is a rug that he plays on and that is currently residing in the basement (his toy overflow area). I made Brett go take pictures of the set-up because coming across Ky's toys in various settings like this is something I'm truly going to miss when he's all grown up.

The cars are all lined up on the street and there are some Little People gathered together.

They're circled around a trash can. Are they homeless trying to stay warm? And what is the alien doing here?

Improving Speech - The "F" Sound

Kyler talks a LOT but his speech has always been pretty unclear. It's improving more and more but we are consciously working with him to get him to pronounce things correctly. Some things he has the ability to pronounce but falls into his old habits of saying the words the way he always has.

The "F" sound is what we have been working on the most. He used to use an "H" sound in place of the F. Football and firetruck are the words we have been correcting him on the most. But today his little sister was letting out some gas and I had to teach him the correct way to say the word "farted." I never imagined myself high-fiving my son for saying "farted."