Talking Tragedy with a Toddler

I am not the only one blogging about this topic this week, but I still wanted to share. If you are on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, or are a blog reader you have likely seen this quote from Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers)...

"When I was a boy and would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.'"

Yesterday I heard on the radio that a couple of explosives had been detonated at the Boston marathon. When I got back home I turned on the news so my mom and I could see what was going on. Kyler was watching and we had to explain to him in a non-scary way what we were watching. We told him some people got bad ouchies. He immediately saw the fire trucks, ambulances, and rescue workers. We then focused on those very nice people who were taking the people to the hospitals. So, I guess maybe it's a mother's instinct to focus on the helpers. Somewhere along the lines while growing up, we tend to lose focus on that and look more at the bad guys and tragedy. But seeing those helpers is something that can help comfort everyone, young and old.

The other thing I seem to do in the aftermath of these tragedies is use it as a Christian teaching moment with Kyler. He is to the age where he understands good and bad and he knows that Jesus wants us to do good. He actually brings it up quite often. When he does something nice, he will sometimes say that he is like Jesus. It makes my heart smile. :) He talks about how the firemen and police are so nice like Jesus. I pray that he grows up to be as selfless as these helpers we watch.

He also knows that when people die, we pray for them that they will go to heaven to be with Jesus. It's not easy talking about death with a two-year-old but I really feel like he needs to understand it at least to some extent. We focus on heaven and life after death (and lucky for me he hasn't asked a whole lot of questions beyond that) rather than the sad/scary parts. He also understands what death means in terms of no longer living because of seeing and learning about dead animals (which he is okay with as he knows about the circle of life and has been exposed to hunting all his life). Anyway, as sad as it is, we have had to pray for those babies at Sandy Hook and we will pray for the Boston marathon victims as well. We pray for their families that Jesus will help them not be so sad and for the victims themselves that Jesus will take them to heaven.

It's not easy talking tragedy with a toddler, but I feel like kids need to be exposed to the real world. We don't give Kyler all the details or anything too scary (especially now because our boy tends to have nightmares already). But kids need to understand that there is good and bad, and that bad things can happen to good people. They need to find a way to cope with bad things happening. And one way our Christian family copes with this is with faith and prayer. When he is older, we will also explain to him the sad/scary parts, and talk about how the victims and their families feel. He will need to continue to have empathy for others in order to be the person we want him to become. A helper.