No More Nursing

I have decided to wean Kyler from breastfeeding starting this week. I am really really glad I did it but I think it is the right time to stop. I thought I would nurse for a full year but some things happened that just made it a lot harder that I originally expected. This isn't a post that many of you will be interested in, but I thought I better document why I stopped in case someday I have regrets.

1. Pumping at Work - Originally I did not plan to return to work after Kyler was born. But now that I am back 3 days per week I have to pump on those days. And let me tell you, that is just not any fun. I have to lug around a big bag with a pump, cooler, and bottles. I have to keep track of time and pump when Kyler would normally eat. This started out at every 3 hours but he is now eating every 2.5 hours at daycare. This is especially hard when I am out of the office. Sometimes I have had to pump in the vehicle. Besides the inconvenience, I cannot pump as much as Kyler eats at a feeding so then I end up having to fit in extra pumping sessions at night. It is just a constant battle that I am tired of.

2. Pregnancy Prevention - While it is definitely not foolproof, breastfeeding is somewhat of birth control. We have decided to have one more child in the near future and breastfeeding will prohibit that from happening. Especially because my doctor will not start fertility treatment again until I have stopped nursing for 3 months. You can check out my other blog for more information on what we hope to be our upcoming second pregnancy.

3. Attachment Issues - I feel a little guilty about this one because I think it is the most selfish reason but it is a big one for me. Kyler is really whiny around me a lot of the time. And when I hold him he almost always wants to nurse. So he ends up crying in my arms and I have to either nurse him or hand him off to his dad. (And this is often after he has just eaten so I know he isn't really hungry.) He is also starting to use nursing as playtime and after he is done eating or not hungry he will bite and pull which is, as you might imagine, not comfortable.

4. Convenience - I guess this one is a little selfish too but I spend a ridiculous amount of time pumping and nursing. In the past couple of days I have started giving Kyler more bottles and it is so nice. I don't have to leave the room or go to a bathroom in a crowded public place to nurse. I can actually be folding laundry or cleaning up the kitchen while he takes a bottle (he can hold it on his own). I don't have to think about when I am going to pump when Brett and I go out without Kyler. I know washing bottles will be somewhat time consuming but I can do that while Kyler is taking a bottle - and I won't have to clean a pump all the time.

5. Confusion - Kyler thinks anyone and everyone can nurse him. Anytime someone (especially women and more specifically well-endowed women) holds him, he will turn and put his mouth on their goods. It is sometimes very embarrassing with people we don't know that well and they always think my child is starving. Typical guy I guess?

So I know for some people these would not be good reasons to stop nursing at 5 months. But for me, they are more than enough. I have gritted my teeth and done it a month or two more than I really wanted to but now is the time. I did enjoy it a lot at first when I knew I was sustaining my baby and giving him the most healthy food available. And especially recently when he gets full and gazes up at me with a big smile on his face before going back for a little more. That is something I know I will miss immensely but it would have to stop eventually because my little baby boy is growing up fast!

Update: This turned out to be a good decision. Kyler is now much happier with me. He has stopped fussing so much when I am around or holding him. Within a week he was all smiles around me and it has helped our relationship tremendously. Even B noticed he became a happier baby. He also stopped trying to put his mouth on everyone else's ta-tas.